I Love You, Moron
by auroramcchickenatmcdonalds
Summary: Aomine and Kise finally come to terms with their feelings for each other.


It was difficult to focus on basketball when you wanted your opponent to screw your brains out.

Ryota Kise felt that way during his game against Daiki Aomine, which he was sure was the worst timing ever. He wanted him in so many ways, it would be impossible to name them all.

_Why even bother with the basketball? I want him NOW! Damn, I sound like a spoiled brat who wants a pony, and I don't even care. Aominecchi is worth it. _

But, just like every other 16-year-old boy, his hormones won.

"_You're the cock sucking champion, aren't you, Kise? Have you gotten a lot of blowjobs, or have you given them? Tell me, blondie, how many guys have you gotten on your knees for? How many have bent you over? How many have made you scream like I'm going to tonight?" I shivered, but I decided to play along._

"_You're so full of yourself." _

"_Well, tonight you're going to be full of me, too, Kise. Kise."_

"KISE! What the hell, man?"

Daiki Aomine was getting suspicious. Why did Kise keep looking over at him? Why did he look like he wanted to eat him alive? Had he looked at him like that before? It was weird on so many levels.

_Kise has about 500 girlfriends, right? So why would he even want a guy? For that matter, why do I care? I like boobs, damn it! Big ones! But lately, the girls I look at are tall, blonde, and with almost no boobs at all!_ (He was ignoring their friendly personalities, and how one was called Ryoko, so if he slipped up and called her Ryota she could attribute that to choking or a stutter. He never said she was smart.)

_So, what, am I bi now? Does it work like that? Is it girls and Kise, then? Whatever. Well, it's not like we can keep playing when he's like this. I should go see what he wants. And if he wants Little Daiki, I guess I could oblige._

"Yo, Kise. How's it going?"

"Everything's wonderful. You know how much I love losing. It's my favorite thing ever."

"Hey, stop right there. You did… great, okay?" If you discount the stares, twitching, and looking like he was off in another world.

"All that reluctance tells me how serious you are."

"When did you get so sarcastic? You're supposed to be the happy one. You're not Kuroko."

"At least Kuroko would understand how I'm feeling!"

"No, he wouldn't! He doesn't have emotions!"

A female voice interrupted their argument. "Ha! I found you! Imayoshi and Wakamatsu forced me to go find you, like I'm their slave or something. Well, at least you're playing basketball. They should be satisfied with that. Now stop being so mean to Ki-chan. Apologize, now."

"Alright, Satsuki… Sorry, Kise."

"Sorry for what?" He was sure that if she'd thought of it, she would be pulling on his ear by now. _She's practically his mother! Ha ha ha! Momoi's a foot shorter than us, why is he so scared of her?_

"Geez, woman! I'm sorry for making sarcastic comments when you were upset."

Kise laughed. "It's nothing compared to Coach. 'Oh, that was _such_ a good free throw. That would _definitely_ win us the championship.'"

"If their sarcasm doesn't bother you, then why does mine?"

Kise shook his head. "Well, I'm sorry that I love you, moron."

Aomine stopped in his tracks. _Did that just happen? Did Kise just really say he loved me? Am I having hallucinations? He's supposed to be the model with 5,000 girlfriends, who's not even supposed to think about me. Stupid Kise, making me feel things._

Momoi had to literally bite her tongue to stop herself from laughing.

_Why do I even bother with boys?_

* * *

_How do I deal with Kise now? He says he loves me (but who doesn't?), but could it ever work? I mean, I'm straight, right? That stuff with kissing Tetsu was just an accident. The first time was a heat of the moment thing, and after that, I was just going along with what he wanted. Everybody knows I love boobs, but then we have Kise, attacking me with his handsome face and perfect ass. He's not as hot as me, but he's a model, so that must count for something. _

_Maybe I should just avoid him for a while._

* * *

Aomine decided he needed to talk to someone about what he was feeling.

"What the hell do you want, moron?"

_Have I made the wrong choice? No, she's a girl, she knows all about this romantic crap._

"Kise told me he loved me the other day. Since then, I get this kind of feeling when I think about him, but it's not like envy or hungry."

She started poking his face. "Do you _love_ him?"

"I know what a boner feels like, Satsuki! It's the opposite. It's like my heart is getting hard."

"You're such an idiot. You do love him. And thank you, by the way. The girls in our class have a betting pool to see which of the Miracles you'd go out with. A lot of them picked Kuroko, but I picked Kise! What should I buy first? Oh, wait, you'll actually have to grow some balls to confess to him, and that's not happening anytime soon, now, is it?"

"It was cold out that day! Plus, we were nine- they've gotten a lot bigger since then!"

"They can't be that much bigger if you still haven't confessed to Kise."

* * *

"What do you do when you tell someone you like them, but they don't say anything back?" Kise posed this question to the other Kaijou players in the locker room before practice.

"You consider yourself lucky. Any time I try talking to women, they threaten me with a restraining order. I would love to have a time where she just doesn't say anything." As he had expected, Moriyama would be of no help whatsoever. He wouldn't even bother with Kasamatsu, who hadn't even spoken to a girl.

"You yell louder!" _Why didn't I make sure Hayakawa was gone before I asked? I was hoping Kobori would be here, because he seems like he'd know about this stuff. Why does he have to be off looking at colleges today?_

Unbeknownst to Kise, Aomine was doing something similar.

* * *

"Yeah, right. That didn't happen."

"You don't think a famous model asked me to fuck them?"

"No. I think you're lying to us, Aomine. In reality, Kise confessed to you. He didn't mention anything about sex. Stop it with that look, Momoi told me about it." Imayoshi was the last person in the world that anyone would want to have something on them.

* * *

After two weeks, 17 unanswered phone calls, and 75 unanswered texts (45 inane blabbing, 15 requests for a one on one, 14 requests to hang out normally, and one not-at-all-sad "Why doesn't Aominecchi like me anymore," complete with enough emoticons to form a basketball league) Kise finally tried a new tactic: stealing Kagami's phone and calling him with it.

"Who is this?"

"I've missed you, Aominecchi!"

"Kise, did you get a new number or something?"

"No, I stole Kagamicchi's. We hang out every day now. He's really great, and his homemade curry is the best! Plus he gives good back massages…" Kagami's "What are you saying, you bastard?" kind of killed the mood, but Kise would never let that stop him. "Maybe I'll ask him on a date."

_Why am I so angry when I picture Kagami dating Kise? Obviously, I am the better choice, but it's not like I'm in love with him. Except I just pictured me and Kise going on a date, and it's just right, everything is perfect, and best of all, Bakagami isn't there._

_Then we get to the love hotel, and… he falls asleep on my lap. NO, Daiki! You're not a chick! Fuck him already! Why doesn't this bother Dream Me?_

_Fuck, I think I really do love him._

_I should go see him._

* * *

It was a half hour to Yokohama, and another half hour just to find the way over to Kaijou High School. Eventually, he made it, and the crowd of screaming girls helped him get to Kise. However, Aomine did not expect Kasamatsu to have any tricks up his sleeves.

"This is a closed practice. Visitors aren't allowed."

"I just want to talk to Kise."

"How do I know you're not trying to spy on us?"

"I would have sent Satsuki if I wanted to spy."

"I wish you had!"

"Shut up, Moriyama! Anyway, the fact of the matter is that you are not allowed to be here, Aomine. You will wait until after practice. It'll only be about half an hour, unless he decides to take forever with his hair again."

Kasamatsu approached Aomine again before Kise left the locker room. "Listen up. I know exactly what you're here for. Kise's told us all about it, no matter how much we protested. I really don't care what you do in your bedrooms or whatever, as long as I don't hear about it and Kise can still practice. But I swear, if you ever break his heart, I will find you and break your legs. Imayoshi can do whatever sick penalty game he wants to me afterwards, and I'll take it. I don't want to hear him crying over you anymore. It was so annoying; I almost ripped my ears off." Even Aomine noticed the slight smile in Kasamatsu's eyes, almost as if he were speaking about a little brother. "But then again, his fans would probably rip you to shreds before I had time to lift a finger. I've heard rumors that they hit each other with traffic cones when they fought over his photo book. Scary stuff. I hope you can handle it." He walked away, trying and failing to stifle a laugh.

Kise emerged about five minutes later, but Aomine immediately deemed the view worth it. Kise was positively glowing. _How did I get this lucky? I never thought I'd say this, but I feel so unworthy._

"Aominecchi! I really have missed you, you know. I was so sure you hated me, I was ready to-"

"Kise. Don't ever date Kagami, you hear me? Otherwise I'll kill him."

"Yeah, and I'm sure Kurokocchi will join you. He likes Kagamicchi, he told me. And it's so obvious that he likes him back. You have nothing to worry about."

"I need to tell you something." For once, Kise was quiet, so Aomine pressed on. "I love you. When I pictured you dating Kagami, I was so angry I nearly lost my mind. I mean, I always liked your ass, but I never thought it would be more than that. I don't know if I'll always treat you like you deserve, but will you let me try?"

Kise looked even happier than Aomine had ever seen him. "Yes, Aominecchi!" He leapt into Aomine's arms, but the sudden onslaught almost caused Aomine to drop him. In the struggle, he ended up grabbing Kise's ass. "Aominecchi, you pervert!"

"I didn't mean to, I swear! But… I was going to ask if you wanted dinner, but maybe I should have this, instead." Kise's stomach rumbled, and Aomine gave in. "Dinner it is. Anywhere is fine. But there's something I'll want first." He placed his hands on Kise's face and leaned in. "Is this okay?" Kise nodded, so he kept going. Eventually, their lips met, and Aomine was sure he'd never stop feeling lucky for as long as he lived.

* * *

Momoi has a Coach purse now. Aomine doesn't know how she afforded it, but she won't tell him. Momoi doesn't know how she was allowed to enter the bet in the first place. Aomine and Kise live stupidly ever after, and Kagami still doesn't know that Kise tried to use him to make Aomine jealous.

I can't believe I'm finally publishing this. I will hopefully do the season 2 drabbles at some point, since people have asked about them.

Thanks for reading!

~Aurora


End file.
